It was useful. I've done it 2 or 3 times by the fire. The shaman who did initiation was Black Elk from the Lakota tribe. When I asked who taught what it means to be man, the answer was - the Italian comics that were popular in Yugoslavia, the caracters were Zagor and Black and Mr. No. They had big muscles, they were emotionless, they faught against evil and apparently had no woman. I was neglected by my parents so no lessons from them. The artefact in which I stored everythin that doesnt serve me being a man is a school bag. I had axcellent grades in high education, a lot of abstract knowledge, but that was not for me, so now I am a farm worker.
After meditation I felt stronger, tommorow day after meditation my camaredes at work who usually mock me were respectful, were pouring me drinks and feeding me with their own food.
Love you Teal and team.